afabulouskilljoy | (no subject)

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the girl

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Poison isn't sure if he's hung over or what, but he spent half the morning after the Pride events feeling kind of groggy and a little dazed. After finally untangling himself from Jack he stumbles into the bathroom. He emerges again in a pair of his pajama pants - beige with black bears on them - and t-shirt that's too big for him. Probably Jack's. He's pretty sure he still has glitter in his hair despite his shower.

He makes a little noise, kind of pitiful, and then realizes he hasn't seen Sunny since yesterday. He goes to knock - gently - on her bedroom door.

"Sunny Girl, you here?"

He tries not to be too loud - he thinks it's only fair that he let Jack sleep.

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Girl rolls onto her side so that she can watch him cooking, hugging a pillow against her chest. He wants to talk and she's going to listen to him.

"Yeah?"

Poison shrugs and gestures with his free hand. "Yeah." He frowns a little and looks over at her. "For one, it's easier to get hurt that way. Which doesn't mean you shouldn't do it, because it's great, but."

He gropes for the words he wants.

"You know you never have to do anything you don't want to, right? And you can tell someone 'no', and it doesn't matter what you're in the middle of doing?"

"Yeah, I managed to figure consent out on my own, P," she says, gently, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. "I'm like...ninety percent sure he's a virgin and, anyway, you don't have to worry. He's good to me."

"I'm just making sure," he says, a bit helplessly. He's missed twelve years of her life and sometimes he is painfully aware of that.

"Good." At least Carson is good to her. He finishes the bacon and goes to make her a cup of coffee. "Do you want anything other than bacon? Do you have uhm-- do you have like... any questions?"

"It's okay, P," she says, gently, tugging herself up into more of a sitting position,still swaddled in her blankets. "What kind of questions? And coffee. Please."

"I have no idea," he sighs, laughing a little. "About... things. I feel like I missed all my chances to help you figure shit out."

She'd had to do it on her own. He hates that, even if Sunny has turned into an amazing young woman. He comes over to the couch, leaving her a mug of coffee the way he knows she likes it and the plate of bacon. He shuffles back to the kitchen, grabbing his coffee, then returns to sit on the couch with her.

Girl shuffles around so that she can lean against him as she starts to pick at her bacon.

"I did figure it out on my own," she says, quietly. "But you guys must have, too. Figured it out with each other, I mean. You were kids together, right?"

"Yeah," he answers. "I mean, we - me and Ghoul - figured it out with other people before we figured it out with each other. Mostly me, though." He shakes his head. He'd been dumb, avoiding the one person he wanted.

"It was really scary to be attached to someone like that," he says. "I mean, being with the same person more than once, even."

"Yeah?" she says, glancing at him. She's got no real context for any of this - she doesn't really know anything about him before she showed up. "What were you like when you were a kid? Did you..." He raises her eyebrows. "Did you screw around a lot?"

"So much." He laughs and shakes his head a little. "Just trying to do as much living as I could - I figured we'd all be dead any day. I was afraid to get close to anyone, to have like... real feelings for them. Because what if something happened?" He shrugs, thinking of Ghoul.

"Then I finally made a move on Ghoul and that was pretty much all she wrote. But he and I also figured out a lot together."

She pops some of her breakfast into her mouth and chews, thoughtfully.

"Is it super weird I ask you what you guys figured out together?"

"A lot of our boundaries," he answers. Poison considers how much to tell her. "We experimented a lot with each other - things I'd already done with other people, sometimes, but doing the with Ghoul was different. We were willing to get really vulnerable with each other, uhm."

He tries to think of how much detail he wants to give.

"I mean, we had safewords."

"Wow. Okay." She files that information away. It doesn't really surprise her, though. "Yeah, I think it's going to take me and Carson a while to get there. If we get there. It's...nice to just be able to spend time with someone."_

Poison blushes. "Well you asked," he says a bit helplessly. "And maybe you decide you never want to go that far, which is totally fine. Just saying, it's-- I mean it's who I am." He shrugs, not sure what else to say.

"It is really nice, though. I hope I get to meet him when you're feeling it. I mean, I know it's a big step, introducing someone to your uhm. Your parent."

"I do want him to meet you, though. I'm just...figuring out how I feel about him first, before I bring him around here." She looks at him, head tilted. She kind of likes that they can talk like this. "Do you...Is that who you are with Jack?"

"Do you really-- I mean. How much do you wanna know?" Poison's eyebrows pull together and he cradles his coffee close, watching her closely. He wants to be honest with her, to kind of let her know what he has experience with in case she ever has questions, but. He's also not sure how much he should tell her about his sex life, since they walk a weird line between a parent-child relationship and a friendship.

Girl finishes her food and puts the plate aside, reaching for her own coffee, lifting it to cradle it against her chest. She considers the question for a moment, her eyebrows drawing together.

"How much do you want to tell me?"

Poison laughs. "I mean, I don't want to traumatize you. You don't need to think about me having sex. With anyone." He blushes. "Even if Ghoul insisted about walking around naked sometimes so you wouldn't feel weird about bodies."

He rolls his eyes at the memory, but he's got a fond look on his face.

"I'm just.. trying to tell you that I have vast and encompassing experience, even if I'm not that much older than you right now, and if you-- there's nothing too weird or too gross to ask me, if you need advice or information or... whatever. I've probably already done it."

"I'm an adult, P. I can cope with the idea of you having sex," she says, rolling her eyes. She grins at him. "But, you know, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to." She laughs a little. "Did he? I don't remember that?"

"He was the fucking worst." He shakes his head, smiling. "He kept saying my insistence on clothes was gonna give you a complex. I didn't do it because I was ashamed of anyone's body, I did it because I didn't want to be surprised by dracs while I'm naked."

He laughs a bit. God he still missed him so much. Jack isn't Ghoul, just like Ghoul could never be Jack. He loves him, and it scares him.

She huffs a laugh, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"You make it sound like you could never get him into pants."

"I mean, there were seriously some days when it was a struggle." He laughs, then shakes his head. "I think he did it just to mess with me most of the time."

God, he feels an ache that he's managed to hold off for a long time. He tries not to think of Ghoul too hard.

"Uhm, anyway, I've insisted on clothes all around for your sake and Jack's." Since Sunny is happy without pants (Poison can't blame her) and Jack walks around his own apartment naked sometimes.

She huffs a laugh and nods, taking a sip of her coffee. "Yeah. Thank you. For that." She grins. "He's a virgin. I told you that, right? It...kind of freaks me out a tiny bit when I think about it."

"Yeah, freaked me out when Jack told me he was one, too." He turns his mug in his hands, fidgeting. "It's-- I mean, it is and it isn't a big deal, y'know? I mean, it just means he hasn't done it before, the value or lack of value placed in it is totally arbitrary."

He shrugs one shoulder.

"But it also kinda makes you feel like you're under pressure, huh? To do it right, whatever that means."

"Yeah, exactly. I just don't want to fuck anything up, you know?" She glances up at him again, eyebrows raised. "Jack was one? Seriously? But he..."

She's not entirely sure how that sentence is supposed to end.